SOME INITIAL THOUGHTS ON PLANNING A WEDDING

There is a ton of stuff to do. More than you could have possibly expected. And it’s all up to you--even if you are not a person that has organized anything apart from a DVD marathon of “The Commish” accompanied by some pizza bagels.

Your vision of a laid back thing where everybody is chill and barefoot and there are tons of fireflies and wildflowers and maybe some animated fireworks a la that one scene from Lord of the Rings and just a tad bit of ecstasy is maybe not what other people were picturing and also probably impossible.

Unfortunately, you are not an anime character that can get married under a dewy fern.

Newsflash: the movie Father of the Bride does not stand up to the test of time.

Newsflash: GET ORGANIZED!

Calling a Save the Date card an STD and saying “I’m going to send you an STD,” might be funny to you, but it’s not really considered cutting edge humor in wedding planning circles anymore.

I still haven’t decided between Pachelbel’s Canon, or Wilson Phillips’ “Hold On” for walking down the isle. (But we do know that when my maid of honor appears the music is immediately going to shift to the Seinfeld theme song).