Friday, August 20, 2010

What's Wrong With Ronnie and Sammi's Relationship?

Everyone in the Jersey Shore house is acting like there is a serious problem going on between Ron and Sam. As an experienced lover myself, this baffles me. All I see going on between these two is a deep, unending, ceaselessly uprising spring of love. It's just that Ronnie and Sammi's love, like all loves, is unique. Here are some of the characteristics of their very special kind of love:

- It is often found wearing the disguise of drunken bickering, bordering on verbal and at times even physical abuse.

- Ronnie expresses his love for Sammi in three major ways: by calling her a fucking bitch on national television; by driving away in a cab and giving her the finger; and then by vomiting and passing out in her bed.

- Sammi and Ronnie need each other. Sammi needs Ronnie because she is an extremely boring and narcissistic piece of female trash. Ronnie needs Sammi because he is a mildly retarded juicehead goon with the emotional maturity of a toddler. Like Romeo and Juliet, together they are two broken pieces that add up to one whole ... something.

- This isn't about Sammi and Ron, but I just want to say that Snooki and JWoww are really amazing friends.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

OH MY GOD I want more posts! Gimme posts! I reload and reload and still it's all Sammi and Ronnie and Sammi and Ronnie and fine, okay, but I want more posts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am commenting on the matter.
Thank you.

A Reader

September 15, 2010 at 8:29 AM  

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