Dear Daphne Merkin

I recently read your article in the New York Times Style Magazine called “Houston, We Have Facelift” and I just wanted to say thanks.

Thanks for writing another one of those articles in which the female author, after much hand wringing and an avalanche of rationalizations, decides that she might, in fact, be open to plastic surgery.

And then thanks for winkingly shilling us this product (where we can get it and how much it costs) under a girl talk veneer.

Thanks for contributing to a culture in which we feel inadequate upon seeing a rogue crease in our mouth area when standing in line at the fucking Au Bon Pain.

And thanks for contributing to a future in which our daughters will feel compelled to spend their lives on a heinous crash course of dogged adjustments to their faces, having a reduced compass with which to find value in themselves.

To all of the women who have written similar articles, leaning against huge couch cushions and staring sadly into the distance, thanks. It’s great to know that there are so many options for looking younger.