Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Best Films of the Decade, Part 1

"Beep Beep!" (2008) - Everybody now: who's got the keys to my jeep?! Burt Reynolds does! Need we even ask? Priceless, priceless. I've seen this movie literally a thousand times.

"Dicktard" (2006) - We lost so many family jewels over the summer of '09, but none more crimson than Pat Swayze and Edward McMahon. This was their swan song, truly.

"Up the Butt" (2007) - Begins with Tolstoy and ends with a bang: again, literally! 9/11. 9/11. Never forget.

"I'm Not So Incredible" (2004) - Ummmmmmmmmmmm...I beg to differ! But seriously: when Tom Berenger sinks his teeth into a role? You. Try. To. Take. That. Role. A. Way. At. Your. Own. Peril. Seriously! You'd have better luck skimming moonlight off the surface of a pond. And then selling that shit to the summer breeze. "M'lady." Fuck that. Fuck you.


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